One Day

I have to begin this post with a confession: I sneak into movies. There I said it. Now that that is out in the open you should know that I do this frequently. About once a month I treat myself to a Sunday Funday where I pay Carmike $5 and catch up on all the movies I couldn't coerce someone to go with me to. One day I challenged myself and prepared by bringing (I also sneak in food/drink...I'm a bad person, I'm aware) 4 Dr. Peppers, 2 chocolate items and 2 sweet items. I had a beverage and snack for each movie. If you are good at math then you realize I saw 4 movies back-to-back in one afternoon. I was kinda proud...don't judge.

Anywho, this past Sunday afternoon I decided to see "The Help" and "One Day" because my roommates saw it while I was out of town...sad day. "The Help" did not disappoint and I definitely teared up at several points. If you haven't read the book, you NEED to because the book is ALWAYS better than the movie and this film was great. I also lucked out because the 4pm show was sold out so I had to attend the 5pm show which left a considerable gap until the 9:45 showing of "One Day" and "Captain America" was the perfect filler. It was well made and I loved how it alluded to the era it was created in by being less dark than the most recent Batman series.

Now to the piece de resistance: "One Day" with adorable Anne Hathaway and dreamy Jim Sturgess. I now want, no need, to move to England so I can run into him on the regular. This movie was very sad and I loved it because it really made me think about life. The underlying theme is that of squandered moments. I don't want to give away the plot so I won't. After viewing the film my heart ached for all the moments that I too had squandered. I could really relate to the main character in the sense that he watched his life pass him by and felt remorse.

I am incredibly happy with the track that my life is currently on, but there are a lot of moments in the past where I have chosen poorly or thought only of the present. I think there is a lot to be said for living in the moment and it is joyous, but one should also have the future in the back of their minds.

The movie also made me think of my love life as any romantic movie will inevitably make a single lady do. I tend to fall head over heels for assholes. I like nice guys, I really do, but I can never seem to find one that actually has a pair. I am a really strong personality and the last thing I want to date is some guy that has no spine. Hence my attraction to jerks. The movie really made me consider how many great guys I have missed out on because I instantly wrote them off as a friend.

Here is to being more open minded and giving nice guys a chance. I am going to move away from the jerk with the devilish grin and start going for the man with the angelic heart. Who knows how it will work out. At the end of the day though, I won't have squandered any precious moments on someone who is inherently a not nice person.

Another plot point is that one day can make a dynamic difference in your future and life and I am looking forward to my one day and where it leads me!

Man's Best Friend

Today I donned my new bikini and headed out the front door for a relaxing afternoon of sipping Dr. Pepper poolside and catching some rays while listening to Adele. However, I was greeted with a loud clap of thunder the second my feet hit sidewalk. Instead of becoming less ghost-like I will have to settle for staying pasty and writing. I really like a short description I wrote aobut my Gram and Grandma's home at Kentucky Lake and I am going to attempt to vividly depict another story from my childhood. So bear with me ; D

Jenny:

I wanted desperately to name my second little sister Barbie, after all she was a great doll to play with and it was the perfect choice. Sadly my parents went with Hannah. I didn't hold a grudge and I gave them a second chance when my mom was pregnant with my third little sister. I went with a more conservative option, Jennifer, and was shot down yet again. Needless to say, I was beginning to question whether my guardians were capable of naming children after turning down two such obvious winners and whether I would ever get the joy of giving someone a name. Much to my chagrin, Emma (the one I wanted to be Jennifer), was the last child my parents decided to have. Now my dreams of naming someone/something were ruined after such a short run.

Just when I began to lose hope and focus my creative energy in other areas, we decided to buy a dog! It was a brown, short-haired dachshund and I was given the privilege of picking out her name. I could barely contain my excitement and instantly went to the name Jennifer, because that is a great name for a dog. My parents agreed that her Christian name would be Jennifer (finally they were seeing the light) and offered the suggestion that we call her Jenny for short. All in one fell swoop I had a new playmate, I was able to fulfill my dream of naming something, and I developed a love of nicknames. It was an epic day and the start of one of the best relationships I have ever had.

Jenny was resilient if you had to choose one word to most aptly define her. How she survived with four small girls who picked her up by her tail or neck frequently, flipped her upside down for kicks, laid on top of her as a pillow or played roughly with her I will never know. She once fell down an entire flight of stairs and was only out of commission for a mere moment. She was a trooper in the truest sense of the word.

Her tormented upbringing may be part of the reason why she trusted very few people and hated most. Why she loved and protected us four hooligans with her ferocious barking and vicious bite, I do not understand. From the beginning she watched over us and made sure no one got too close. In her nine year reign as plucker of our heartstrings she managed to bite a couple friends and attack damn near every one of them. You learned real quickly who liked dogs and who was terrified by the panic in their eyes when Jenny unleashed her yap.

Woe to those who never made it into Jenny's inner circle. Once on the inside it was magical. She could sense your mood and read what action was required from her to make you feel better. I am a very private person and anytime I was sad I would hide away in the living room so that my family wouldn't be able to find me (no one ever went in that room), but Jenny always knew. She would search me out and come snuggle with me until I had vented away all the pain and hurt. I was big spoon and she was little spoon.

All my secrets were locked away tight from everyone except Jenny. She was the only living being that knew everything about me and she loved me all the same. There is something unbelievably comforting about the presence of a pet. I know she couldn't comprehend the insecurities I shared or voice her anger at the people who had wronged me, but she could and did love and my life was better for having her be a part.

The last time I saw her she was three days dead and rigamortis had set in and it was one of the saddest moments in my life. I drove to Walmart and sobbed for 30 minutes straight. I felt like part of me was gone forever and I missed my best friend terribly. We painted a paw print on a stone step to place over her gravesite and planted a rose beside her resting place. Every time I visit my parent's house it is nice to see her rose still growing strong and think to all the fond moments we shared.

No particular big memory comes to mind, just all the little moments that added up to equal an inseparable bond. The threads that strung our lives together. For every night that we snuggled and I felt safe a thread developed. Each time that she sought me out and consoled me during a sad day created more threads. Walks at the park, romps in the yard, afternoons being lazy on the couch, rides in the car with the music up and the windows down, adventures in nearby neighborhoods and hunts for cheerios; all threads.

Chuck Norris eloquently depicts the sentiment I wish to express when he states, "More and more I was coming to realize that the rewarding part in life was the journey, not the destination." While she won't arrive with me at my destination, Jenny shared a large portion of my journey and I will always cherish her presence in my life. I hope that everyone gets the opportunity to experience having a travel buddy as wonderful as Jenny.

Art

Hi :D

Okay so I absolutely love art, but I'm pretty average (if even that) as far as skill level goes. I love painting, drawing, collages, etc. My favorite thing to draw is cartoons b/c I am better at them than anything else. I just felt like sharing a few of the things I've done, so enjoy:

Clearly, Spongebob is my favorite cartoon!! And the middle one is a collage I've done for my bedroom. Hope you enjoy!

Patience

God has a funny way of speaking to me when I get a tad bit whiny. Recently I have felt discouraged about love and have been complaining because I want a good man to share my life with and I seem to attract jerks consistently. That is just a brief backstory so you can understand that at 25, having just ended another relationship with the wrong guy, I am getting a little bored of looking for Mr. Right. With this mindset I have been throwing myself a small pity party and last Sunday night God reminded me of the things that really matter most.

I attend New Vision Baptist and I love Pastor Brady and his style of preaching. I highly recommend if you are interested in finding a church to visit this one. Plug out of the way, now onto the sermon that really struck a chord with me. Patience was the theme and this sermon was part of a larger series, Half of my Heart. The series is about giving God more than just part of us and what is easy and diving in fully. I love this concept and it is something I struggle with because I love to be in control.

Anywho, Brady mentioned a quote toward the end of the sermon, "People will either drive you crazy or drive you to the cross." I really like this because I think we have the opportunity to chose which direction we're heading. Patience is evidence of spiritual growth and a lack of patience reveals selfishness. Patience involves a change in perspective. These concepts ring a little blunt but true. I really love the idea of perspective and I believe that it greatly affects our individual outlooks on life. The closer we are to God the more understanding we will be and we will react more generously.

A few relevant bible verses that Brady listed are:

-John 15:4-6

-Proverbs 14:29

Max Lucado once said, "Patience is more than a virtue for long lines and slow waiters. Patience is the red carpet upon which God's grace approaches." Patience is a great moment to share about God's grace and love. People are used to those surrounding them being selfish and a bit self-absorbed, they will notice when someone displays patience. I think that you have to also be cautious to differentiate between being patient and being a pushover. I do not advocate letting someone walk all over you, but I do advocate being kinder.

I arrived at church Sunday night and laughed to myself when I read the sermon notes to see what the topic was. Anytime I get frustrated or discouraged, God sends me a message through a sermon, something I'm reading, an uplifting friend, or kindness from a stranger. He is always constant and realizing He is in control allows me to be more patient. Knowing that there is a plan and I can't see all the steps is hard for me to accept, but it means that even though I might not understand why I have to wait on certain things; God has a plan.

Whenever patience is considered it is only a matter of time before someone mentions Job. He lost everything, but remained patient and God rewarded him greatly. God rewards those who persevere. I obviously need to learn this lesson because patience and perseverance are the theme words of my life. James does an excellent job of explaining what patience achieves for us as followers. Everything always comes full circle and anytime patience is mentioned I think of my favorite quote by Mother Teresa, "Let nothing perturb you, nothing frighten you. All things pass. God does not change. Patience achieves everything."

Limitless

Last night my friend RJ and I went and watched Limitless, starring Bradley Cooper, in theaters. It was a really good film and had several moments of hilarity (which was unexpected). As we drove home we contemplated what shape our lives would take if we could utilize more than 20 percent of our brains on a regular basis. Imagine the possibilities; the movie is aptly titled because they are truly limitless.

If I could tap into my brain's full potential, what would I do? I think I would first go to Vegas and use my newfound math skills to rack up lots of cash. Then I would use my new nest egg to start and build my own non-profit organization. I would be able to maximize efforts and use minimal amounts of donor funding. This would draw donors to my company and would effect major change globally. I would also give back to my family who has always been supportive. And I'd be a little bit selfish and travel the world.

As we continued talking about how great it would be, I began to think about a smaller scale. What if I could train my brain to use 21 percent or even just 20.3 percent? How much better would life be then? It wouldn't be drastic, but it could effect meaningful change on a smaller scale. A favorite bible story of mine is in Mark 12:41-44 when a beggar woman donates her last 2 coins to the offering plate. Jesus commends her because she gave what she had.

We wouldn't require NZT (name of drug in movie) if each individual gave a larger part of themselves or devoted more time to the betterment of society and humanity than squandering our talents on video games, blogs, television, etc. Not saying that distractions are evil and that we shouldn't enjoy some down time, but what if we took 3o minutes everyday and instead of using it to mind numbingly surf the internet, we devoted it to making ourselves smarter or helping others? I think we'd eventually be much happier and benefit numerous people.

All that to say, I have decided that after Lent ends (40 days where you give up simple pleasures to remember the sacrifice Jesus made in the desert and to rely more on God) I am going to attempt to improve myself. I haven't decided exactly how I am going to accomplish this task, but I am going to try new things, talk to people I would normally bypass, help people more, and just do other small things to make me and the world I live in a better place. Maybe I will eventually function at slightly higher than 20 percent brain power. Wish me luck!

Adele's newest album 21 is playing on my stereo which means that this is a good day. The sun is shining and I have been rather productive thus far. I find that my mood affects my drive to write and I only have the urge when I am in either a really great mood (which is the case most days and today) or in a horrible mood (but I cuss more when pissed so this is typically reserved for my private journal and not the blogosphere).

Lately I have been feeling really fortunate for all the things in my life and I feel like reflecting on how blessed I am. For those of you reading that are really close to me, you are aware that I was sick with a virus/gastritis/bronchitis/laryngitis for a solid month. I didn't realize how draining it was on me body and soul. This also happened to occur during my desperate search for a job. They say bad luck comes in spades and I believe this is also true for good luck.

A quote I really love is an Indian proverb that states, "When it is dark enough, you can see the stars." I think this quote is beautiful because it is during our darkest hour we see those pockets of light that litter the sky of our lives. I really cherish my friends and family who made me smile when I felt like crying. I also appreciate so much more all the wonderful seemingly insignificant moments of each day. Walking outside and basking in the sunlight is so much more valuable after being stuck inside. It is only after we have been in the darkness that we can fully appreciate the light (be it a glimmer or a beam). I am closer to God because I was forced to trust him when I couldn't control the situation. It is extremely frustrating for me to not have control especially on anything food related because I so love food! But God used this frustrating time to further prove his sustainability and constant and consistent presence in my life.

Now, I am fully functional again and completely content. I am healthy and able to eat without medicine or immediately puking afterwards. I have not one, but two, jobs. I love working at Newk's and I am really excited to start substitute teaching for the Rutherford County School System. God truly is good. I have an amazing family who always makes me laugh and I couldn't live without. This weekend, my precious nephew (Eli, who is now 10 months) took 3 to 4 steps towards me without help! :D Melts my heart. I am surrounded by hilarious and awesome friends! I would say life is good and Adele is capturing my mood perfectly.

Final Four Failure

Duke is out of the tournament this year. And yes, it took me this long to be able to state the previous sentence without a stream of tears running down my face. All jokes aside, I was a bit devastated that my beloved Blue Devils didn't even make the elite 8 this year. Alas, we will have to wait until a couple years from now when Curry and Irving are mature and the Plumlee Three are dynamic to dominate the tournament.

Since, my team is out I can focus my attention to other teams, who knew they were out there. As a Duke fan it is redundant for me to stress my hatred for North Carolina as anyone aware of basketball is aware of our intense rivalry. This rivalry is personal for me since my own mother is a Tar Heel fan. I am positive I must have been adopted and I am still awaiting the results of our blood tests. RJ (best friend for life) also feels this bitter betrayal by his own love and girlfriend, Tiffany. I am trying to like her in spite of her one blatant flaw, her love for a pathetic team. It is this intense hatred for Roy Williams and his team that led me to support another team that puts a funny taste in my mouth, Kentucky.

At least Calipari and his Wildcats chose a proper color of blue to don. I rooted for them against Ohio State because the Buckeyes win too often and as a recipient of hatred, based on winning records, I am qualified to dish out hatred for the same reason. After Ohio State's demise, I gladly rooted for Kentucky to embarrass the girliest looking blue I have ever seen. Now with only 4 teams remaining my temporary loyalty to Kentucky is holding true.

Butler I root to fail because of how close they came to snagging our Championship from us in last year's tournament and on principal alone they must go down. However, I abhor VCU due to their debasing victory over my Blue Devils in 2007. Their win was the reason that for the first time since 1996 my glorious team did not make it out of the first round action of the tourney. So I must pick Butler because I despise them a little bit less than the Rams.

UConn I could care less about one way or the other so I am picking Kentucky to defeat them. After Kentucky bypasses Kemba Walker and his Huskies they will move onto Butler and hopefully beat them as well. So this tournament has gone from one of hope to a lesser of evils sorts. As much as I don't want Burris and Bubster (best f'n friends for life) to have a victory and obtain their 8th Championship (giving them 5 more than Duke), I hate Butler more. Also, Burris has supported a losing franchise (The Cubs) for his entire life and deserves for one of his teams to do well.

At least I still have the Lakers to carry out my dreams of a ring this year. I am hopeful that we can three-peat! We have the talent as long as each member of our team steps up during the post season. My only worry is Gasol because he is a weak finisher during play-offs and I do not like having him play such an integral role on our squad. Kobe is fired up and I have seen the rat face more frequently as the season progresses, which is always a good sign. Phil should round off his career with an even 12 rings and my boo needs to start his ring collection on his other hand now. Oh basketball, how I love thee!